Me First

OH HAI GUYS, HOW DO YOU LIKE THE NEW SITE? Welcome to my new digi-home and the hub for the freelance biz that I am FINALLY launching. Sweet jeebus, I have to admit that there was a point yesterday where I was 100% convinced that this launch was not going to happen.

There are a few things that still need to be tweaked and lots of things that needed to be added... but I am so freaking thrilled with my new site that I actually wept buckets of happy tears last night.

So. How did I do it? Well, it was a three part process really, and for today's Mental Health Monday post I'm going to reveal my less-than-polite kick-ass secrets to YOU.

Oh, hello!


I stopped being polite, started being honest, and realized that I had to put me first. I cut out all the negativity from my life. Negative people, negative thoughts, negative energy, negative habits.... all of it. Threw it all into a giant garbage can.... and lit that biotch on FIYAH. And that, my friends, is the fire that fueled me right up to this moment.

I got to a point in my life where I realized that I needed to start practicing what I was preaching. Here I was, telling some of my absolute best friends in the world "Nobody is going to put you first. Because people are selfish. Nobody will ever care about you more than you care about you." I was dishing it out, but I wasn't listening to myself.

I am the queen of putting my wants and desires on the back burner because of what somebody else needs from me right now. Enough was enough. I wasn't happy with my career, my financial situation, my emotional status, my health, my body image, my eating/sleeping habits... my whole damn life.

My mind was racing with a million different things and I was so caught up in making everyone else happy, that I completely and totally lost sight of my own happiness. So I stripped off the excess and got back down to my bare bones wants. I made a mental picture of the life I wanted and started making those hard decisions and changes that I should have made years ago for myself.


Set a deadline. Make your lists. Hunker down. Lock yourself away from the world. Give it 750% of your effort. Drink lots of coffee. Take breaks only for food. Ignore your phone. Avoid Facebook. Work at it until your eyes bleed, your hands are cramped, and your brain has probably melted.

You have to put in the blood, sweat, and tears if you want to see results. Nobody is going to do it for you. Nobody is going to force you to do it. Nobody is ever going to encourage you to stay in all weekend to work instead of coming out to play. But you gotta do what you gotta do.

Yes, I miss my friends. No, it was not fun for me to retreat to Jersey and stare at a computer all weekend long. But the end result of finally launching my business on time and proving to myself and the world that NOTHING (not even chopping a part of my finger off) was going to stop me from getting this shit done?  ...It was worth every second of mild sadness. And I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat without changing a thing.

I wanted to make big changes in my life and I knew it wasn't going to be easy. So I gave it all the energy, focus, and effort that I could. And boy, oh boy, did it pay off.


Recognize that you deserve to feel amazing. All the time. Everyday.

You need to love yourself before you can love anyone else and also before anyone else can love you. If you don't like something, change it. If you're sick of something, get rid of it. If you're ready to publicly be the badass you've always been deep down inside, show the world just how fan-freaking-tastic you think you are! Chances are, they will love you just as much.

When you put yourself first you gain a confidence and a glow that cannot come from anything else. People want to be around you, talk to you, work with you, laugh with you.

But most importantly, when you love yourself.... it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks. And that is the greatest benefit of them all.

AND THAT'S IT. Those are the three phrases that motivated me to this point. To this day. To my epic double launch of March 25th.

Oh yeah, that's right. It's a double launch kind of day. Because not only am I proud to announce my independent freelance biz, but today is also the launch day of eBooks Suck (but they don't have to).

eBooks Suck (but they don't have to)

Yep. My name is finally in digi-print, ya'll! In this fantastic publication, affectionately referred to as the most comprehensive guide to eBook conception, creation, and promotion quite possibly ever, I wrote the chapter on social media marketing alongside 40 other geniuses that have been there and done that.

Check out all the info over at Hungry Entrepreneurs and head over to Amazon to buy this wonder tool for just $4.99 (because learning all the tricks shouldn't break the bank).

And check back here this Wednesday for a special sneak peek of goodies in my Industry Hump post!


Celebrating by dancing around to Space Capone all day, xx Nikbear